您需要的两件事才能过上充实的生活

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Growing up as a young girl aspiring to make her mark on the world, not surprisingly one of my heroes was Oprah. For as long as I can remember, I have been inspired by Oprah’s work ethic, her championing of diverse stories and voices, and how as a woman of color she is alwaysunapologetically herself。鉴于我花了很多时间仰望奥普拉,所以我是过着“最好的生活”的重要支持者。

I’ve been reflecting a lot on this concept over the last year — the events of 2020, especially, have changed what it means for many of us to live our best. In the midst of a global pandemic and aracial injustice crisis,过着我们最好的生活并不意味着传统意义上的“拥有一切”。现在,我们的最佳生活更多地是关于找到快乐和满足。

那么,在这些艰难时期过着充实的生活需要什么呢?每当我看着关于生活良好的研究和智慧时,都会反复出现两点,毫不奇怪,它们与我们许多人建立了联系。您需要的两件事是充实的生活找到含义in your life and to develop social relationships.

1.通过寻找意义来生活更好

几年前,当我和姐姐一起度假时,她带来了精神科医生和大屠杀幸存者维克多·弗兰克(Victor Frankl)的副本男人寻找意义。她被书抓住了,并将其传给了我。我也有同样的回应(我们的gal oprah也是他作品的忠实拥护者!)。

In the book, Frankl details his experiences as a prisoner in the Auschwitz concentration camp and his observations about the differences in how his fellow prisoners fared under such extreme circumstances. Essentially, what Frankl shares is that the greatest task we have in our lives is to find meaning from one moment to the next — and that no matter how much is taken away from us, we still have the power to choose how we respond to our circumstances.

Frankl中央相信生活是“不是什么st for pleasure… or a quest for power… but a quest for meaning.” He explains that there are a number of ways that we can choose to find meaning on our journeys. Some people find their meaning through work, some by loving others, and some through having courage in difficult times. The key here is that we all possess choice — it’s up to each of us to decide which path we follow and to choose how we want to live.

Frankl’s wisdom is enduring, and contemporary researchers are still talking about the critical importance of finding meaning in life and revealing new aspects of how this shows up. (Check out Daniel Pink’s great book驾驶了解激发我们工作的因素。)

I’ve found in my own research that our ability to find meaning and purpose in life is directly connected tobeplay最新备用网址。In my life, the quest for meaning and the commitment to living authentically have been inextricably linked. One of the best things I ever did was to give up being an employee andwork for myself。The decision to build a business around my passion for social justice, inclusion, and empowerment has made room for a tremendous amount of meaning in my life — and I’ve seen this happen for countless others who’ve committed to authenticity as well.

When we find our meaning and purpose and live it out by being authentic, we’re much better able to live a life centered on ourvalues, which helps us feel fulfilled.

2.通过建立社会关系更好地生活

In one of my favorite泰德谈话心理学家苏珊·平克(Susan Pinker)提出了一些令人大开眼界的研究,表明对寿命更长的答案不是我们所期望的。一项研究了许多生活方式方面的研究表明,长寿的前两个预测因素不包括饮食,运动,饮酒甚至基因。这两个预测因素是密切的关系和社会融合,即您一整天与其他人进行的互动,例如向您的出租车司机,为您服务午餐的人等。这项研究表明,与他人互动会影响化学过程人体,通过降低皮质醇水平并增加多巴胺的释放来改善健康。简而言之,为了保持健康,人们需要人们。

关系是长寿的预测指标,它们也是幸福的预测指标。一个学习哈佛大学(Harvard)于1938年开始进行,开始了解什么导致幸福健康的生活。这项将近80年的研究表明,“比金钱或名望更亲密的关系使人们一生都快乐。”该研究发现,健康的关系对身心健康都有积极影响。从本质上讲,良好的关系是我们生活质量和年龄的强大指标。

So what is the best way to go about cultivating strong, close, and meaningful relationships? The answer here, too, is authenticity. As I reveal in my book真实性原beplay最新备用网址则,当我们始终选择尽可能多地知道,拥抱和成为真实的自我时,我们会对自己感觉更好,我们将这种精神带入我们的互动中,而这样做,我们邀请其他人做同样的事情。这促进了与他人的更有意义和更深的联系,从而改善我们的健康和幸福。

这些作家和研究人员的工作证明了一个令人着迷的观点 - 为了真正照顾自己并过着最好的生活,我们需要将其集中在内向上,以寻求意义和向外建立关系。研究人员正在继续发现这些更深的方面(意义和社会关系)对我们的福祉甚至我们的长寿有多重要。

因此,在今天之后,如果您想尽力而为,那么要点非常简单:找到意义并发展关系以过上更充实的生活。我可以根据自己的个人经验告诉你,这项研究是现实的。

I'm Ritu.

我是屡获殊荣的生活教练,授权演讲者,作家和包容专家,致力于帮助您过上最佳生活。

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